unstuck – Achieving Metanoia

Resistance Empowers

August 10, 2022 by Achieving Metanoia, posted in Uncategorized

I’ve been resistant to what I feel is expected of me and what I feel is my truth, my path.

I think that’s why I feel such uneasiness within myself.

I’ve attempted to get others to see things my way in order for me to progress on my goals; needing others’ approval to go after my goals. When they don’t see things my way and are pessimistic or say what they think I should do instead, I get drawn into self-doubt, adapting to their doubts, fears, comforts, and compliances that are projected onto me in order to maintain their levels of comfort.

I can no longer expect the type of support needed to progress from those who are comfortable in their complacency.

People can only help you at the level of their comfort.

I have to remind myself that sometimes people can only support you on the level that their beliefs allow them. It’s not that they’re wishing ill upon me or wanting worse for me, it’s just that they don’t know any other way other than the conditioned way. So, my life’s vision may trigger discomfort for them which may be expressed as concern, doubt, annoyance, and sometimes attempted control, which results in my feeling held back. Intentionally or unintentionally, this may be true. But, what if most of the time it was done out of love? Yes, it may be their fears projected onto me disguised as love; but it’s still due to their level of understanding, nonetheless.

I’m learning to give up the resistance and not allow their words to affect me as I have in the past. For words become your reality. Focus on MY TRUTH, what MY standard of being is. I’ve focused too much on the upset that they were trying to “hold me down” and didn’t respect my independence or free thinking. Their vocalized wishes and their statements only prove that they didn’t have faith in me. I allowed the discouragement and the lack of “aligned support” to distract me.

Now I know that others’ words only have power over one’s life when you give them that power.

And today, I choose to no longer empower them with my resistance. Don’t let people decide who you are.

Foggy Start

December 5, 2021 by Achieving Metanoia, posted in Uncategorized

Today wasn’t perfect. Habits are hard to break. At least I drank an 8.4 oz Redbull instead of a12 oz. That’s my attempt at being “positive” about today. I keep asking myself, “why is it so hard to change, especially when you’re so dissatisfied with the current situation?” However, now that I think of it, it was quite the tug of war between the healthier choices vs. old habits and patterns. I made a lot of compromises with myself, which resulted in making some healthier decisions even though it wasn’t the perfect ideal choice. So with that in mind, today wasn’t perfect, and it wasn’t a complete fail either.

Ok, Let’s Try This

December 4, 2021 by Achieving Metanoia, posted in self-talk

Think, Be, and Speak as if aiming an arrow towards all I aspire to in life. My thoughts, how I express those thoughts and beliefs, the words I choose, and actions that I decide to take should be in harmony with my values, or else the aim may be a bit off from hitting the bullseye of my dreams.

Broken

December 3, 2021 by Achieving Metanoia, posted in Uncategorized

Haven’t been in a mood to do much of anything. Perhaps, it was needed time for me to sit and reflect on what I’ve subconsciously chosen to resonate with thus far and what I consciously choose to resonate with moving forward. What energies do I wish to captivate? Next, what is needed from me to become like these energies I aspire to attract? What habits must I adjust or let go of? Focus on that. Choose the new experiences and get out of the loops. Prove that the lessons have been received.

Step By Step

January 12, 2020 by Achieving Metanoia, posted in Uncategorized

Uuuggghh!!!
Not gonna lie, this isn’t very easy. As I try to find time in between the obligations to others, I start wondering if I’m fooling myself. Am I just stuck in this “living for somebody else” energy? Maybe it’s too late to find solid ground and change my world around. Being honest, yesterday I didn’t do anything but binge-watch an old t.v. show that I didn’t even realize I’d enjoy as much. Perhaps it was just the need to not think (although I did) and ruminate over being stuck.

But while binge-watching some “dramedy”, I came to a conclusion to do a little something each day. That is, take even tinier steps than I planned on making. I think that I’ve focused too much on the final goal; which, is quite a leap from where I currently stand. So this is a reminder to self to put in place stepping stones and milestone achievements to assist me along this journey. In the process, I hope to be comfortable in who I am while being more and more grateful in the process as I pass each mark. Who knows if I’ll ever reach that ideal apex of life, but at least I can begin enjoying the journey and not find myself in the same spot 6 months (or years!) from now still wondering “what if”.

Photo by **Tembela Bohle** from **Pexels**

To even try to reach that ideal apex I have to start.
It’s time I show up for my self even if it’s little by little. Because maybe, hopefully, that will be the momentum needed for progression. I’ve been reading, meditating, listening to self-help motivational audio for years- only to come to a conclusion of how self-unaware I had been all this time! In turn, I’ve placed this urgency on rectifying my life in as little time as possible to make up for all of the “wandering time.”
However, as I ponder on just how to do that, I stay stuck. Stuck because my mental muscles aren’t yet developed enough to take such leaps and bounds, and I’m terrified that I’m still lost, that I’m again so unaware of who I am and where I’m going. But, I have to have faith.

So my plan is to take more reasonably smaller steps in order to build the momentum and confidence needed to make solidifying, aligning, and elevating actions. I have to take faithful action while allowing myself room to blunder and to express an idea one day, then the next week know that the idea was terrible. I’m free to change my mind; that’s a part of creating! Being comfortable in understanding something as one way only to realize later that I was completely off. It’s ok to be wrong sometime; it’s a part of the process. I remind myself that there are plenty of successful people who have blundered, who have changed their focus, and who have made pivots along the way. It’s ok that I haven’t been on a perfect path and will possibly continue to make mistakes but, at least I’m trying and at least I’m on my journey.